Sometimes you feel like a Nut...

Its been a while since I last posted here, but felt that it was time to do so once again. I need to vent you see, release a little of the pressure that is in my head, and maybe even get that damn elephant off of my chest.

Last Monday I received a phone call from my dad, "Chris, the doctors told us that the breast cancer is back. They diagnosed Mom with stage 4 breast cancer. Its under her arm, in her breast, in her neck, and one tumor inside her skull." With those words a giant beast got up from its chair, walked over and started sitting on my chest. Its been living there ever since. Mom then got on the phone, she was crying... "The doctor just walked in and said he couldn't cure me... He then walked right out! How can he say that and just walk out? I feel..." There are no words for the grief my family feels, or any family in this situation.

Cancer is a war that claims more lives than the Taliban, Saddam, even Hitler. So why is it that we decide not to go into this battle... To fight it until no one else is claimed by this disease which leaves most families in the world in loss. In a word I believe it to be an issue of money. Our dear president finds it great to fight a battle that is profitable... Leaves him looking like a war mongering hero, but refuses to address the issues that truly strike the American and people of the world. If we spent our energy, dedication, and resources on winning this battle people like my mom, my friends husband, another friends grandmother, my grandfather, and yet another friends mother wouldn't have to go through this. Part of me feels more importantly those left behind wouldn't have to deal with this type of grief. A loss of those you love before they die, and then a process of watching them waste away.

During this time I find myself wanting to escape reality... reality is like a swig of bleach when you are expecting water. Yet I must drink from this cup, it will not pass, the lord will not relent, so mote it be. Until then we can go on with our marches against a nation of people that would rather live under a dictator of their choice than a dictator from America that pretends to be offering a new way of life. Shame on the president, shame on our country for not addressing the true wars of life, and instead turning to items of distraction. How can you be pro-life and kill innocents in Iraq, make cuts on welfare, make cuts on social reform, and leave children in schools having to share a text book. No our president is pro-death, and pro-birth. His ideology a short cut to the grave of sinful man. I am angry at him and our nation for choosing to kill rather than enrich life. I rant now... and for now I silently grieve.